Small-Town Preacher's Wife

We are leaving in 2 days to drive to Alabama! It’s a 22-hour non-stop drive to my parents’ house, but we are breaking it up into 3 days on the road, taking into account that we’ll probably have to make many stops for the kids (7, 4, and 9 months). I am, of course, looking forward to seeing family & friends in Alabama, but I’m also looking forward to the drive! Am I crazy? Maybe. But this is why I like road trips:

1. You can’t do laundry or wash dishes when you’re in the car.

2. The kids are all strapped in, and so even if they scream or make a mess, they are at least confined and safe.

3. An extension of #2–the kids have a more limited area in which to make a mess.

4. When they all fall asleep, I can sneak into the front seat beside my husband and pretend we’re on a date, just the two of us. We can listen to the radio and talk without interruption.

5. I have a stack of books I can’t wait to read.

6. No cooking on road trips.

7. I think it’s easier if you have more than one child to go on road trips. The kids kind of entertain themselves (when they’re not fighting with each other).

8. The hard part of road trips is packing. Once you get everything in the car, you’re done. If you left it, you left it. There’s always a wal-mart at the next exit.

9. Making a new drive is always exciting because you get to see new towns and states. The girls and I flew out to Colorado when we moved last summer, so we’ve never made the drive before.

10. All that time in a small area with my family + no chores to do or things to distract us = a great bonding time!

The other day, Naomi, who is 7, and I were discussing “Tangled.” We were discussing the character of Mother Gothel and why she never let Rapunzel leave her tower. I think that Mother Gothel is a very complex character. She is sometimes kind to Rapunzel, and sometimes not. Rapunzel, likewise, has complicated feelings toward Mother Gothel.  Adults can easily see how Mother Gothel is only kind to Rapunzel because Rapunzel gives her what she wants–eternal youth. But to children, Mother Gothel is not the usual Disney villain that you can pick out at a distance.

I told  Naomi that Mother Gothel never let Rapunzel leave the tower because if anyone saw her, they would bring her back to the castle where she belongs. I said that Mother Gothel only wanted Rapunzel because her magic hair made her young, and that Mother Gothel had kidnapped Rapunzel from her real parents.

Naomi then said, “That doesn’t happen in real life, though.”

How I wished that I could tell her that no, of course kidnapping doesn’t happen in real life. I have always struggled with how much I should tell my children about the dangers of our world. I would love for them to live in a world where no one is hurt or hungry or sick, and since that is not the case, I would prefer to protect them by not letting them even be aware that these bad things do happen. I wish that the worst thing that they could even conceive of would be not getting to the go to playground because the baby is sick, for example.

We sponsor a few children through World Vision and Compassion International, and a couple of years ago I began to get Naomi involved in the letter-writing process. I had her draw a picture to send to one girl we sponsor who is Naomi’s age, and whenever we get letters from this precious girl, I show them to Naomi. I explained to her at the time that this little girl and her family don’t have all the things we have–like food–and so we help them so they will have what they need. That is very true, but I didn’t also add that there are many, many kids who aren’t so fortunate to have sponsors or other help, and who really do not have enough.

When Naomi asked about kidnapping, I decided that I couldn’t lie to her even though my mother’s heart was screaming at me to do so. So I told her, “Well, it doesn’t happen very much, but there are some very bad people out there. That’s why it’s important that you follow our rules, and when you play outside, you stay in the areas we told you were OK. That way you will be safe.” I don’t know if that was too much information, or not enough, but she seemed OK with that, and she didn’t ask any more questions. Ever since then, though, the conversation has been on my mind.

These are the kind of things no one teaches you in childbirth prep classes!

Today was a great day, even though it started a little too early for me. Sarah woke me up at 6:22 so I gave her my cell phone to entertain her while I dozed off again. (If anyone ever gets an early morning call from Sarah, I apologize.) After breakfast Naomi worked on a story she has written about “Princess Naomi.” I found some preK and K workbooks on clearance the other day, and Rachel wanted to start working on those. By 9 a.m. I was feeling pretty proud of myself because the kids had already done such wonderful productive activities 🙂

I do have to confess that during Sarah’s morning nap the girls did watch “Tangled.”

I also set up the kids’ sand & water table for the first time this year in the backyard. However, we didn’t have any sand, so I just filled it with water. It’s better that way, because last year the sand & water table was really a mud table. During Sarah’s afternoon nap, they played outside and had a blast. Of course they got soaked. Rachel came inside saying that Naomi poured water on her “and that was not fun.” But she quickly added that she then poured water on her sister. Ha!

We walked down to the post office where we had a super exciting bank statement in our mailbox. Then we came home and Naomi got to play on the computer a little and we also read books. We have started the Summer Reading Program at the local library and it’s a little different than the ones I’ve done in the past. Instead of getting a reading log where the kids are supposed to write down the titles of the books they read, each girl has a sheet of paper and they put stickers on it every time they complete 15 minutes of reading. They are supposed to earn 10 stickers per week, so I have to make sure they get some reading time in the morning and again later in the day so they don’t get too far behind. So far today they have only read one time. I think when we leave for our road trip to Alabama, they will be getting a lot more reading done in the car!

Sarah keeps chewing on Naomi’s flip-flops, which I hate. She also chewed on some grass today while I was setting up the water table. She either has a rug burn or a sunburn on her knees, the fronts of her lower legs, and the tops of her feet. Since she hasn’t really been in the sun, I would say it’s rug rash from crawling, but it looks just like a sunburn! I feel so bad for the poor baby but she doesn’t seem to notice it.

Finally, tonight, Tim called while I was giving the kids a bath, and against my better judgment I handed the phone to Naomi so she could talk to him.  Sure enough, my phone dropped into the tub. Now I’m ready for bedtime and “mommy time.”

The last time Tim and I watched a “chick flick”–which he claims he was tricked into seeing, as if I would do that–it was Have You Heard About the Morgans? Or something like that. Anyway, this NYC couple was put into the Witness Protection Program and moved to a tiny town somewhere in Colorado. (It actually wasn’t a bad movie.) I loved the little town and told Tim, “I want to live there!” and he pointed out that we DO live there.

I really do like living in a small town. I like being able to walk to the library and to the post office (where there is never a long line and they know who I am). I like the neat blocks with sidewalks, and the park that is just down the street. I like the Pepsi machine outside the small grocery store where you can still get a can of soda for fifty cents.

Now that it is summer, Naomi and Rachel have been playing outside by themselves quite a bit, which is a first for us. I never before let them outside unsupervised. But now they have been given boundaries–they can play in the backyard, front yard, and church’s side yard, and they can ride their scooters on the wide sidewalk that runs from the parsonage to the corner. I enjoy having the windows open and hearing them as they play outside, and having them run in and out of the house throughout the day. It feels nostalgic, like this is the way summer used to be for kids. But I do still worry when I can’t see them every minute. I wonder, are they too young for this responsibility? Will they remember all the rules I’ve told them about not going anywhere near the street, and to scream if an adult they don’t know approaches them? (I actually told them to scream and run back in the house if an adult they don’t know tries to talk to them, and I told Naomi to grab Rachel.) I struggle to balance their growing independence vs. my desire to always protect them from everything.

So my question is…at what age did you allow your children to play outside with limited supervision?

Today was Naomi’s first day of summer break. Somehow, I feel like I’m on sumer break, too. No keeping up with homework or spelling words or reading lists. No setting an alarm clock in the morning (even though Sarah inevitably woke me up at 6:30 this morning anyway!) I am looking forward to summer. For one thing, I am not moving while 8 months pregnant, so this year is almost guaranteed to be easier than last!

Tim has been faithfully getting up at the crack of dawn for a few weeks now, so that he can have some quiet time before the rest of us wake up and start creating noise and chaos.  So, this morning, when Sarah woke up at 6:30 a.m., I just brought her out to the living room and gave her to Tim and went back to bed so that I could rightfully sleep  in on the first day of summer vacation (Thanks honey!) I got up at 8:30, just in time to put Sarah down for her first nap, ha. Then I headed out to tackle our flower beds. The previous pastor’s wife planted huge flower beds all around the parsonage’s front and back yards. I, on the other hand, have never planted anything. My parents gave me a plant once, when we bought our house in Alabama, and it died…I was so embarrassed I eventually threw it out, pot and all.

I spent about an hour and a half raking out the flower beds, just trying to clean up all the old leaves and twigs and tumbleweed. Tumbleweed is everywhere out here! I’m sure I also pulled up a few good plants…but, a plant that is going to survive in my garden is going to have to be able to handle more than a few tugs from a rake.  The wind blows all kinds of things through the yards. A few weeks ago, Naomi drew a picture for her friend who lives down the street. She went over to her friend’s house and they were not home, so she left the picture on the doorstep. Of course the wind blew it away. Well, I found it the other day cleaning up the yard! It blew across the street and up against our fence. It is now on our piano. Still hasn’t made it to the neighbor 🙂

So I am not sure at all if the flowers are ever going to bloom again, but we are trying. Tim got out this afternoon and cleaned out two flower beds, removing the weeds (or at least we are pretty sure they were weeds).

The kids ran in and out of the house all day. It is NOT HOT here. I can’t believe how different the weather is from Alabama. I actually got cool this afternoon and shut the window!

Sarah was quite crabby this morning and just wanted to be held, nurse, and sleep. Very unusual behavior for her. Teething? Coming down with a cold? No fever yet.

We are planning our first trip back to Alabama. We’ll be leaving after church on June 12 and arriving in Alabama on June 14. Part of me is looking forward to the road trip with 3 kids: am I crazy? I flew out here when we moved, so this will be a new drive for me. I enjoy road trips because let’s face it, you don’t have to do the dishes when you’re driving. I’m trying to come up with a good stack of books to take with me.

I am so excited about going back home. I think the coming visit has brought on a new round of homesickness. I can’t wait to see my family again, visit with friends, and go to the BEACH!